Karla grew up in a dysfunctional home. As the oldest of four children, she took on extra responsibilities in the home for her mother and siblings. As a child, she didn’t understand why God ignored her mother’s faith and prayers to change things. As a teen, she was angry and rebellious on the outside, but on the inside she really only wanted her parents to care about her pain and the problems in their home.

She dedicated her life to the Lord at age 17. Thinking her family problems were behind her, she married a Christian man at age 20 confident they would have a good marriage, unaware they both brought problems related to their childhoods into their marriage. She was devastated when they reacted to each other in destructive ways and created a home filled with turmoil and strife.

Desperately disappointed, she tried everything to force her husband to change. His response to her pushing, nagging, and arguing was to withdraw more. Expending all her energy to get him to see the problems resulted in her being out of control, all the while blaming him, believing that if he changed everything would be okay. She searched the Bible to understand what God required of her but often felt more confused.

At her father’s suggestion, she tried a Twelve Step program. The Twelve Steps helped her to realize that trying to control people, places, and things made her life unmanageable. She discovered she was still affected by her difficult childhood. Being a Christian did not remove the effects of the past or another person’s sinful behavior.

She finally realized she was powerlessness over her husband and his choices. Letting go of denial meant she had to face the truth about her marriage and take responsibility for her actions that made the situation worse. Over time, she came to believe that God could restore and redeem the broken pieces of not only her life, but her loved ones’ lives too.

As she changed, she began to see her husband in a different light--not as a mean man intent on destroying her, but as a man struggling the same way she was with a difficult childhood, hurt feelings, character strengths and weaknesses, and a sin nature. This compassion allowed her to treat him with respect, while taking care of herself and setting boundaries.

She had many regrets over what she felt were wasted years--the years when she should have productively served God instead of being consumed with her marriage problems to the exclusion of everything else. As God restored her dignity and marriage, He also stirred up the gifts and talents He had given her and enabled her to reach out to comfort others with the comfort she had received.

During the days of her difficult marriage, she hung onto Isaiah 61:2-4 (NIV) which says that Jesus was sent “to comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion--to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the Lord for the display of his splendor. They will rebuild the ancient ruins and restore the places long devastated; they will renew the ruined cities that have been devastated for generations.”

The long devastated places, the ruined cities, the ashes, the mourning, and the spirit of despair have all been replaced in her life with beauty, gladness, a display of God’s splendor, and rebuilt relationships. She is helping others to restore their lives and relationships too.